Dear Allah

Bismillahirrohmanirrohim

Dear Allah,

Today I've been yearning for you. Wanting to have that connection with you again. I felt like recently my connection with you have been disrupted, I occasionally feel like this when I am too concentrated on the duniawi. I'm so sorry Allah. 

I just do this without realization. I complete my solat, without having much khusyuk and sometimes just rushing to get it done. Ya Allah, please forgive me for this. Please please grant me khusyuk in my ibadah and allow me to continue doing my ibadah with khusyuk for your sake. Aamiin.

I've always preferred to write this in my journal but after a long day of work, I felt like writing this here. What triggered me to write this is because today I've been listening to Aida Azlin's podcasts again. MasyaAllah, it has reminded me of you and remembering you. Ya Allah, Ya rabb ku, I really really am sorry for I feel like it has been forever since I connect with you.

I hope you are listening to this soul who is just searching for a path back to you again. Recently, I've also not read the quran so much and I really need to get back to reading at least 1 page a day. Ya Allah please please forgive me for this. Ya Allah, please put reminders in my life to remember you, to keep making ibadah for and because of you. Aamin.  

The recent xx sessions have not really connect me to you and I don't know why it's doing this. I sometimes feel like it is a chore and I need to find other ways so I can connect with you better. Ya Allah please show me the way to reignite my heart to forever be excited, look forward to learn and seeking knowledge in your religion. Aamin. 

I've lost that touch. I once always felt like I have this button or string to pull when I am in need of a spiritual healing, but now, I don't know where to go to, which button to press. Please guide me to the way Ya Allah. 

All I want is to be connected with you again and just want my heart to be at peace with you in remembrance always. Ya Allah please please forgive me :'/

Aamiin Ya Rabbal Al Aamin.